To see me 

To see me is to see the whole of me

My successes and failures

My thoughts and insecurities

My past and my present

To see me is to know the inside of me

The challenges of fatherhood and husbandry 

The fear of failing at my workplace

The fear of the world knowing what lies beneath 

that surface that desires fulfilment

To see me is to understand the strength in me

To know my passions include my family

They include my writing and the creation from nothing

They include desire of acceptance and approval

They include my desire for love and adoration

To know me is to know this isn’t the whole of me

Who do you like?

I have been writing and hadn’t had a great chance to read some of the greatest writers on who I like. I have had the pleasure of befriending a few like Gemstrong63 and NaughtyNora. Check them out if you like the erotic NSFW and 18+ genre.

This Is Only the Beginning part 2

Nora was looking at me through her peripheral vision. Her gaze lingered low, not at my eyes, waiting, hoping for some sign of affirmation and I had given it to her. The come hither sign in her line of sight allowed her to stand and look me in the eyes and smile. But she was looking for more than that. She was needing something.. something from me that expressed my approval for the job she did. Looking around, it would not be an easy task to find some detail out of line. Ahh, did she clean the toilet? I looked. She saw me looking and she cringed in fear as I looked back at her. “I asked you to clean the bathroom. Cleaning the toilet is part of that task. So, you did not complete the task.” She looked fearful and disappointed in herself. “You are right Cameron. I disobeyed you. I am sorry.”

Punishment. This is a new realm for Nora and me.

Immmediately my thoughts turned to Noras backside. How many? “ Thirty strokes with my belt and twenty with my hand. “ Oh how I do love the idea of a good old fashioned over the knee spanking. I have been a spanking enthusiast my entire life but could never express that part of myself. Nora’s eyes quickly returned to the floor. Fear and trepidation washed across her face. I thought I caught a glimmer of a smile on her lips only for a second.

She knows I demand respect from all that I work with and for me and to use this phrase, hints at the feelings she used to get when her father spoke down to her as a young girl. This kind of banter immediately puts Nora emotionally in a submissive place. A place she loved to be in her head and I liked it because it was the most useful tool I had in my playtime toolbox.

I led Nora from the bathroom to the bedroom where the bed stood next to the window. It was a queen sized headboard bed. I had little hesitation about spanking her in our bed. I turned her toward the bed and stepped in front of her. I knelt down and slowly pulled her black lace panties down. I looked at her cunny. It was beautiful. I could have placed my hands on her hips and took her right then but I didn’t want to ruin her scene.


I looked up at her. Nora looked at me with trepidation, a little fear and a little excitement as she bit her bottom lip.

I returned to her side and looked at her a minute. I just watched her breathe. “Are you thinking of the situation you put yourself in?” I put my hand on her butt. Lightly tapping her bottom. “Yes” Nora said quietly. “I like you taking control. I like having consequence. I also like being here right now thinking of what has to be done and you are right. I didnt complete my task. But.. I did clean the rest of the house.” She was trying to wiggle out of this. Fear was were creeping in and threatening her resolve to actually go through with this. I could see it. As I ran my hand up and down her backside and as we talked, I ran my fingers between her legs. First checking for moisture by putting two fingers in her cunny, then I removed them and moved an inch higher to her beautiful rosebud. I slipped a finger into her bottom as he talked. Nora drew in a breath, opened her mouth and closed her eyes. She was enjoying the sensations of my finger pushing deeper ands deeper into the body.

“You did.” I conceded. But.. , I continued. By not cleaning the toilet, you did not complete your task and in my view, not doing what I told you. That is disrespect. And what is rule number one, Nora, look at me.” Nora looked me in the eye. “ Respect and obedience in all things” She said. “Yes” I replied. With that, I withdrew my intruding fingers, slipped off my belt and doubled it in my right hand and took position behind her, spread my feet and rolled up my sleeve… Nora turned her head away from me. I can only imagine she don’t want to see what I was about to do. “ Nora, please bend over the bed.


In my head I was doing mental exercises. Yes, I am Nora Franklin. Daughter of General Martin Franklin . Commander of the United States and the best men in the United States army. I must have heard that one hundred thousand times. This was my father’s way of giving me courage and pushing me to do my best. This is also what I heard when he was disappointed in me. When he knew, when we both knew I gave less than my very best.

This is the man I love and this was spoken about at length before now. I must have the courage to go through with this. I was wrong. I stepped out of line and this the punishment I must endure to make things right by him. He is the leader in this relationship and while I try, this is the result if I misstep. This is the dialogue running in Noras head. The reassurances she told herself to tell herself she was not in control but she could endure and “ manage” her reaction.

“Prepare yourself Nora” he said. I was almost thinking get on with it altready. My cunny was dripping and I wanted to fuck him so badly right now. I was hoping sex would play into his impact play somewhere.

Thwack! The sound of leather to skin was heard before it was felt. My backside was on fire! I squinted my eyes and and closed my eyes tight as the pain raced through my bottom. I focused on the back and forth motion of the drapery on the window across the bed from me. I knew if I could endure this, I could endure anything he had. He started the onslaught of my bottom in a rhythm. I caught a glimpse of the the belt as it came up over my head and crashed down on my butt cheeks. I can only image what my backside looked like then.

The pain became increasingly terrible to endure. After the tenth swat of his belt, tears started to run down my cheeks. After the nineteenth and twentieth impact, I was sobbing and praying he meant twenty when he said it originally. I slumped onto the floor knowing the punishment was not over yet.

Cameron put the belt on the bed and came to me lifting me off of the floor while encouraging me and complimenting me on how well I took punishment without crying out and moving as instructed. I turned to Cameron and with my arms at my side I faced him and just rested my head on his chest.

We are halfway there, my Love.” He said. His meaning was it was time for my hand spanking. I knew it was coming but hoped he would let that go since I thought I did well with the belt. Cameron bent down and ran his hand across my backside looking at it. I looked myself looking for breaks in the skin as he swung that devil’s belt hard and fast. There were no breaks but my butt was on fire and it was really red. I was surprised at the way it looked.

I stood Nora up as I thought she needed the help. She was a little limp as I skirted the bed, I sat down underneath her and pulled her over my lap as I just told her I would. She was due for thirty swats over my knee. I got her to feel as safe and comfortable as possible. “30 swats , Nora” I said. All Nora did was continue to look at the floor. She had a strained look on her face. Pain was written all over it. I continued. I quickened the pace in as much to get this over with for her as for me. This wasn’t as easy as I thought it would be. I love Nora. I didn’t want to cause her pain but at the same time, I did.

I ran through her education quickly. “Are you going to make this mistake again, Nora?” I asked? I put a tone of sternness in my voice. “N n no Sir, I will n n not.” She replied. Noras bum was a nice shade of red. Little pimples appeared in areas I had given the most attention. Her sit spots looked like they were on fire and I was sure she wouldn’t sit comfortably for a while. I was striking her bottom in a regular rhythm and I heard her hake a deep breath and cry out. She had an orgasm. I stopped for only a second to allow her to recover from it before continuing.

When I arrived at 30, I sat her up and I wanted to know her thoughts but didn’t ask immediately. I just sat her in my lap, holding her, loving her, at times rocking her for the longest time. She was sobbing once again and her panties were still around her knees where I placed them. I asked her to stand and turn around. I looked at her. She had wetness from her cunny dripping down the inside of the thighs .

She seemed concerned when I asked her to do that, but when I pulled out cooling lotion from the covers her concern quickly dissipated. “Thank you Sir.” She said. “Nora, do you want to continue in this line? “ I asked.

Nora smiled through the tears in here eyes and almost laughed when I asked her that. She shook her head yes. “Yes, yes.”she said. “Please.”

“Go get cleaned up Nora.” I fetched a towel and washcloth for her and followed her into the bath adjacent to our bedroom. I helped her to get out of the remaining clothes she had on. I ran some hot water and washed her face for her. The heat of the washcloth made her lean into my touch. This is what she craved. The structure, the direction and the protection and my care given to her. The spankings were not what she desired but knew were necessary. I continued washing her body paying special attention to her cunny and then her bottom taking gentle care not to hurt her anymore.

I had fetched her another nightgown. I helped her to get dressed and I helped her into bed. “I love you Cameron.”she said. She outstretched her arms for me as I climbed into bed with her. I was standing at attention the entire night and looked forward to sweet release with my wife. We made love together for what seemd like eternity. We brought each other countless times that night. We fell asleep together. Silently I thanked God for the blessing he had bestowed upon me in her.


Kissing Cousins

Merideth called me on the phone earlier today. “Hello.” I answered and I could hear her breathing on the end of the line but she said nothing. “Hello? Is anyone there?” I said with some rigidity in my voice. “Marcus?”

“Hi”. It was my cousin, Merideth. We were almost the same age and went to the same school together when we were kids. “ What’s wrong?” I said with not a small amount of concern. She never has a problem speaking her mind so I knew something was up.

“Do you want to hang out?” She said. “Sure” I said. “”Where?” Says I knowing we had all weekend and I had nowhere to be until Monday. “My house” she said. “I will be there.”

With that I got on my bike and rolled down my driveway and headed up the hill. She live no more than two miles away. I loved the way the ride to her house made me feel. My bike gave me a thrill. It was like rush of adrenaline and a strength in my legs. When I arrived everything seemed normal. She lived alone and her car was in the driveway. I jumped off my bike and I hopped onto her porch before ringing the bell.

“What is up?” I demanded. I started to make my way to her living room to sit down. “Marcus”

She answered almost immediately and she was wet from head to toe. “What are you doing?” Merideth yanked me into the house. She pulled my arm so hard I nearly fell in.

She and I nearly grew up together. While her mom and mine were not related except by marriage, they were best of friends. Which meant they spent hours on the phone when not together on weekends and got together when ever they could. So, Merideth and I were best of friends growing up since I had no siblings and neither did she. We did everything together. And do mean everything. We went to the same school, same church and we lived on the same street together for years.

Mer had more of a strict upbringing than I had. Her Dad, my Uncle Martin, was a colonel in the army. He was older than my dad and he had an idea of right and wrong. Mer knew what she had to do. But she just didn’t always do it. She had to be home before her dad called her and before the streetlight came on . She kept bedroom neat and tidy. She had to wash her face, comb her hair.. Uncle Vernon was on on Mer all the time. And Mer was no stranger to Uncle Martin’s belt. I think Mer liked it. She liked the rules and when she wanted to, she did like to break them. She was weird like that.

I remember one night when Mer and I were out on the weekend riding bikes. There was an elementary school behind our house. A big sprawling campus and we would go and hang out there. We were wrestling in the grass and she pinned me down face down. She started smacking my butt hard. “ Ow, Mer! What was that for?” She said she didn’t know why she did it. She said something about me having a cute butt. What ever.

“Mer, it’s getting late. We need to get home.” I was a rule follower, but my mom knew where I was because I told her where I was going before I left. I didn’t need to be home at any special time. Mer on the other hand.. “Mer, Uncle Martin!“

Mer undid the buckle on her jeans and bared her little butt. It surprised me a little bit but not much. “Is it still black and blue?” She questioned me. I looked a little harder in the florescent light of the the schoolyard lighting. “No, just a little yellow.”

I’ve seen Mer’s bare butt before. If we were running around in the woods and had to pee, she would drop her pants and squat. She didn’t care if I saw. She wasn’t shy around me at all. She’d seen me pee too.

I was getting a little nervous for her. She looked at me and said “ I think dad is going to have to take matters in hand.” She lowered the tone of her voice and put on Uncle Martin’s mild British accent and made fun of him. So I asked her. “Mer, why do you push him like you do? Just follow his rules and you’ll stay out of trouble.” I remembered a time when I was sleeping over. Mer had not done something she was supposed to do and Uncle Martin was home that night. He told her to clean up the bathroom after her bath or something stupid like that. He always said to her, “if you refuse to do something I tell you to do, it is disrespect. I can not abide by disrespect young lady.”

It is almost as if you like getting in trouble.” I looked at her half serious, half kidding and was fully inquisitive of her response. Mer replied with an almost devilish look on her face, “I do.” She had a guilty smile on her face, her hand upside down and a finger placed on her cheek.

“I knew it!!!” I yelled. I pounced on her and pinned her down. “You like being spanked by your dad.” I said. Merideth threw me off of her and retracted a little. “It’s not my dad, you twit.. I just like spanking. I like the way it makes me feel. “”I go somewhere far away. “I don’t know how else to describe it. It’s like the pain, the tingle and being in trouble is…hot… “”I just wish someone else besides my Dad would tell me what to do.. make rules for me and..”, she looked guilty again, red in the face..then looked directly in my direction. “And spank me.”

With that I, without even thinking about it, pulled her over to me so she was face down over my lap. I caught her by surprise. Her pants were still undone so I quickly yanked them down and held her down while I started hand spanking her pert little Fanny. Whack, whack, whack. I always loved Mer’s butt. She was small in stature and average size. So my hand was large enough when I spanked her, it impacted both cheeks. She drew her arms up underneath herself and dropped her head. She covered her face in her hands but I saw enough of her face to see the smile from ear to ear and her wide eyed expression at times and tight eyed expression at other times. She could not believe this was happening. Her ass was beat red in no time and when I was finished and I shoved her off my lap. She slowly pulled up her pants. She meekly looked at me for a second through her tears while she buttoned her pants. She looked at me for another second, then threw her arms around me and gave me the biggest hug ever. She kissed me on the cheek. She whispered two words into my ear. “Thank you.”

Our annual family reunion was coming up. Mom was in a fury over what we take, the food and organizing me and Dad. I heard her say “ This has to be perfect!” I don’t know why she was so upset. It is fun place to swim and I get to hang out with Mer all day. I got my trunks on and climbed in the car. Keep in mind this is the 80s where the best way to pass the time is read in the car and play red light green light. I slept most of the journey and when we got there I quickly found Merideth and let my Mom know she and I were headed for the water. I told Mer to tell her Dad. But she didn’t and we bounced off to explore.

Amongst the campgrounds and lakes, there wasn’t much else to do there other than cook out and swim. So Mer and I typically walked the road on our way to the lake and looked for others to get into trouble with. There was no one’s there. When we arrived at the lake, we were alone. But there was a 84 Chevy parked by the water. No one was in the car and it looked like it was abandoned there. No one was in sight. “Oh well” Mer said. And with that she climbed begging the wheel of the Chevy. Me being the insufferable rule follower as Mer called me, I got scared and told Mer to get the hell out. I thought she was going to get in trouble. In the next breath, Mer has inadvertently nudged the manual transmission and the car started rolling down the grassy hill toward the lake. Mer started to panic. Nothing she did helped. The engine wasn’t running but the car was headed right for the lake!

Splash!!! The Chevy stopped halfway in, halfway out of the water and Merideth climbed out of the window. We both could not believe it. I was extremely worried we were both in hot water. I looked at her. She looked at me and we both just started at the car as of it just wasn’t happening. It must have been shock.

With that, an elderly fellow came around the bend of the lake with a fishing pole in his hands. Not paying attention at first until he saw his car in the water and two kids standing next to it. He started running toward us and his car. “ What happened?” I couldn’t lie to him. I told him we were playing in his car and it rolled down the bank and ended up in the water. “ We are really sorry, Mister.” Well he asked about our parents and down the road we all walked. We arrived at our camp site. He asked for our parents. Mr. Johnson, the owner of the waterlogged car told our parents what happened while we sat on the bench as instructed to by our parents.

My parents pulled me aside. I mean we were fourteen at that point. What are they going to do? I felt uncharacteristically brave at that point. It was Merideth that looked a little nervous. I saw both my dad and Uncle Martin both pull out their checkbooks and write checks to this man. It seemed like it was settled. We survived. As Mr. Johnson walked away, he put the checks in his pocket. He looked at both of us as he walked by and looked sorry for us. I wondereded why.

I looked to my mom to gauge the situation before my dad walked over to me. “ How are you going to pay for this son?” I wanted to claim innocence. I was the good one. It was Mer that caused this. But I didn’t. I kept my mouth shut. My Dad looked at me and passed judgement. “Grounded. Four weeks. No phone, no electronics, in your room.” I was floored. That meant Mer and I couldn’t hang out together. Wow. I felt defeated.

I looked at Mer who by then had been taken aside by The Colonel and had been told to take a walk. Mer looked back at me a second in time for me to see the look of resignation and dispair on her face. She started walking down toward the lake beach with her dad in tow. I followed. Trying to stay out of sight, I could barely hear what was being said. I saw the colonel point toward the wooded area where Mer walked and she was looking on the ground, I guess looking for a private spot. She looked back toward me. I couldn’t tell if she saw me but the colonel didn’t when he took a gander my way. She crawled across her already splayed lap. She placed her palms on the ground and looked directly in my direction. I heard the colonel say “ count!”

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Mer counted off as Uncle Martin swung. The look of pain and discomfort came increasing across Mer’s face. I don’t understand why, but this cozy little family correction scene turned me on. I was hard as a rock and my breathing became as shallow as hers was. “Eight, nine, ten.” Mer grimaced. Mer stood up, pulled up her pants and turned to reciece the worst lecture I ever saw. Uncle Martin was an inch from her face. I only heard snippets. “I work too hard!!” “ You are too old!” When it was over, Mer was left standing on the beach as Uncle Martin walked back to my mom and dad. She just stood there rubbing her bum and waited for me to come out of the bushes. I walked down to her on the beach and just stood there. She again, flung her arms around me and hugged me. I stood there for ever just holding her, comforting her, loving her.

After my month of imprisonment, I couldn’t wait to get over to Meredith’s house to talk to her about everything that happened at the lake and through this month. I knocked and ran up to Meredith’s room. We talked for hours, we laughed, we cried. She was and always will be my best friend. We still hang out. We aren’t in so much trouble anymore. We will be going over to my Moms house later this week for dinner. It’ll be a chance for Mer and me to do what we like to best. Talk, remember, reminisce. Spank.


This Is Only The Beginning

Cameron, a newlywed husband to Nora was on his way back home from a business trip when his phone rang. His phone was connected to the blue tooth in his 2020 BMW. He hit the answer phone button on his steering wheel. He was expecting a phone call from Nora, as he playfully called her.

“Hello my Love”, Cameron said to her in the soft and melodic tone his voice normally carried. “Hi, how are you?” Nora said. While smalltalk was fine for the drive home, only fifteen minutes away or so, it was wierd. Nora normally forwent the mondane talk of the day and the events that happened.

Our conversations usually held substance. When there wasn’t anything of importance, we played. We played with a teen age intercoarse.

There was a fluid movement to it I enjoyed. We knew each other, really knew…each other. So when one of us was not up for the normal banter, one of us would start…

“I did a really bad thing today, Cameron.”

Her beginning the game focused my attention immediately as it always does. “Really?” “What did you do?” “Tell me, Nora.” And she would choose some normal event of the day and change it into a sorid line from a Jane Ausin novel.

This time it was something to do with not cleaning the bathroom well enough today. I told her to go back into the bathroom and clean it again from top to bottom. While creating the banter and the back and forth motion in our conversation, I came up with this. “And Nora, use your toothbrush to clean it with.” Total silence on the other end of the line. “Nora?Did you hear me?” A moment of silence and the Nora’s response came with a reluctance in her voice. “Yes Sir.” she said.

I quickly came back at her with, “Then, when I get home, I will inspect it and if it is not cleaned well enough, punishments will ensue.”

“Oh really?” she echoed. I knew she was playing with the words I said to her, which from her standpoint was a dangerous move. I pointed that out to her as I pointed out her attiude needed some serious reformation. She was still in the equal state of mind, not yet taking on the submissive perspective..until.

Knowing her the way I do and her past, all I have to do is talk to her like I was her father and she immediately takes the submissive pose in her mind. It is as if she falls to the floor on her knees with her head down and palms up in her head. She is immediately the submissive when I assume the fatherly role . She knows I like to do this and it is all part of the game. This time, I said she had better clean up the bathroom by the time I got home, or I am going to have to spank my “little girl?”

She became quite, subdued. She lost the bravado and attitude she had just seconds before. I almost regret it when I do it to her. It’s an immediate mental binding she can not get free from for hours and I can do just about anything I what during that time. It sounds like I take full advantage, but believe you me, she enjoys every minute of it. “No, Sir”. This came from her with speed and intense angst.

I pulled the car into the driveway and I could see a flurry of activity through the front bay window. I chuckled to myself and I pulled the car into the garage. I gathered my briefcase and lunchbox up and entered the house through the garage entrance. When I came through the house, “Honey?”

She didnt answer and I was intrigued. Our game was over. Surely she wasn’t still playing, or was she? When I walked to the back of the house where our bedroom and adjacent bathrooms were, I was suprised to see her on the floor in the actual submissive pose.

The bathroom was immaculate. I could have eaten off the floor. I din’t know what to say. She was seated on the floor, naked except for a collar beautifully seated around her neck. Nora had never done this before. I had always wished she would but never had the balls to ask her. We did not venture into the BDSM world as both of our schedules are a little hectic. I presumed she was still in the role, so I played along. I slowly traversed the master bath next to her and motioned to her to get up.

I put my hand down near my side, in front of her face and made the come hither motion with my hand. She was looking for permission, for approval and I had just given it to her.

To be continued…..