Are we what we do?

We all introduce ourselves to new people every day. Think about it. What are some of the first few questions you ask someone you barely know? Marital status, family makeup, and occupation are all up there. So how much of who we are is tied up with what we do?

I am a father, a husband, a son, a writer and then maybe I work for a major home improvement chain. But this is just me. I make a modest income, the kids aren’t going to Disney every year and the wife isn’t flying home as often as she needs to. So there are definite opportunities there.

When I introduce myself, the conversation, unless speaking with someone in the same field, is centered around my family. That is how I identify myself in my own mind. Is that the case for everyone with kids? What about those with no children? How do they identify themselves? It must be more centered on their profession, hobbies or what ever their passion would be. What is your passion?

In U.S., 55% of Workers Get Sense of Identity From Their Job

Seven in 10 college graduates get a sense of identity from their job

I used to think in addition to my occupation, I was an aspiring writer. Thinking it and saying it once or twice added a measure of intrigue that I liked more and more as I got older. Anyone?
MichaelĀ  Jordan

I do this all the time!!!

Someone catches my eye and my interest is peaked. But how do you introduce yourself and the idea about how you are a writer and you’d like to talk to them because  they could end up in a piece you are currently writing?

I mean, how does that go? Hey, I’m Mike. I am a writer and you look just like a character I am about to kill off..can we chat?

This is why writers write about the people they know and change their names.


Before 2019, I spoke about the disease as an almost mythical beast. Cancer happens to other people. It will not effect me except maybe someone that I love contracting the disease.

I watched my mother battle with it in her way. She used only homeopathic and holistic medicine in her last bout with the big C. Aromatherapy, message therapy, special diets full of natural fruits and vegetables, you name it, she had tried it. Some of it helped to halt the diseases’ progression for a short time. After Mom’s third battle, she surrendered. She said it was to hard and too expensive. TOO EXPENSIVE!!!! Really??? It shouldn’t cost anything. When presented with this idea following her third surgery, while I understood the reasons behind her decision, I was fearful this would shorten her life. Three months later, she died.

She called me into her bedroom one Friday night. She asked me for permission to go. I told her if it was her time, it was her time. I thought maybe another three months. Nope. Two days and I was visiting her in a hospital and by that Tuesday, we were attending her memorial service.

I decided in 2016 if this ever effected my wife, which is what I expected due to family history, I would encourage her to use what modern medicine had to battle the disease.  In June of this tear I went to the doctor due to a mass that was small and hard attached to my left testicle. I t was cancer. My Urologist was aggressive and recommended surgery to remove the mass and the testicle. I agreed and now my numbers are lower than when I first presented with the disease and they continue to fall.

I took out insurance specifically to cover the costs associated with fighting this disease. I wanted the option, for my wife firstly. I was  not going to let cancer or fate determine the coarse of my action based on cost alone. The bills are paid and I am cancer free. Praise him.

 One year later

I am cancer free. Praise him.